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I Hate Linux

Sunday, April 24, 2005

Animal Activists: Last Hippy Standing

Yesterday was a friend of mines birthday (Sonja) and for her party, we went to the Shrine Circus.

Out front, were our friends the animal rights activists, or as we liked to call them, dirty smelly hippies. Before going in, we were all joking around about them, and pondering if the 6 of the people I was with, all wearing leather jackets should go outside and counter protest "We love cows! Wear em! Eat em! Milk em. We love cows!" (I know, it's not too catchy, but then the dirty smelly hippies weren't even chanting, just standing with signs).

On their website, Peta says (aka the primary dirty smelly hippy organization):
PETA believes that animals have rights and deserve to have their best interests taken into consideration, regardless of whether they are useful to humans. Like you, they are capable of suffering and have an interest in leading their own lives; therefore, they are not ours to use-for food, clothing, entertainment, experimentation, or any other reason.

From this, I gather that they are not only against circus animals... but also zoos and any sort of private ownership. They seem to believe that animals should be returned to the wild and their natural environments and be free of human interference.

Sounds nice in theory... but what about humans? Humans are by their nature hunter/gatherers, this whole concept of supermarkets, advanced medicine, cars, bikes, even herbicides are pretty modern... if the animal rights activist are all for returning animals to their natural habitat... maybe those activists should do the same thing themselves.

I propose the new hit television show "Animal Activists: Last Hippy Standing".

Unlike many, I refused to watch the show Survivor (or any of it's spawn), from its very concept it seemed fake, challenges and being voted off... what does that have to do with survival? On Animal Activists: Last Hippy Standing, a group of dirty smelly hippy animal rights activists and strand them on a tropical island with only their wits (a laughable idea I know), an artificially populated island full of non native predators and prey (the humans wont be native to they island, so why let them be at the top of the food chain?), and plenty of remotely controlled cameras to get every minute of it on film.

The dirty smelly hippy group would be completely on their own on the island, the only way they would be permitted to leave is if they die, are seriously injured, or renounce their dirty smelly hippy beliefs and can successfully kill and eat an animal on their own for nourishment, not sport.

A nice idea I know... somehow I doubt that we could ever get such a group together, despite how popular such a show would be, hell, it'd be the first 'reality' television show I'd ever watch.

Despite our best efforts to ignore the dirty smelly hippy problem, they just keep going and going and going, thinking that they will be successful in achieving their agendas. One would think that they would take the hint that the vast majority of contemporary societies disagree with their beliefs and methods. Sure, we all want to be nice to animals, but the folks over at Peta and others like them are just extremist zealots who often fail to recognize that virtually all animals you find in a persons home, at a zoo or at the circus have far better lives than they would in the wild with 3 square meals a day, medical car and people appreciating their contributions.

I apologize to any hippies who I may have offended by associating Peta with them.


  • I enjoyed reading about that philosophy. Back when it was called "Deep Ecology."

    By Blogger Dan tdaxp, at 4:27 PM  

  • It's spelled "hippie" and we're not all dirty and smelly, thanks. Some of us are quite well groomed, but just choose NOT to take what isn't ours from the world.


    By Anonymous Sparky, at 9:34 AM  

  • The dictionaries I referred to prior to posting the above said that both 'hippy' and 'hippie' are both correct spellings of it, as do other dictionaries now.

    By Blogger Brendan, at 9:40 AM  

  • Sparky, you are stupid. Hippies are so fucked up, because they are always campaigning for something gay like animal rights, esentially giving animals more rights than humans; or communism, which would ruin society and corrupt government.
    Also, to whoever wrote that article, I commend you. It was funny.

    Check out WebsiteX: The site that abuses the 1st amendment.
    My thoughts on PETA are at my site here.

    By Blogger airraid81, at 7:20 PM  

  • I love animals and I hate hippies....it's quite a quandry for me. I guess my idea of a good time would be to go to a circus and watch an elephant sitting on a hippie.

    By Blogger Conrad Dewberry, at 11:20 PM  

  • Only complete numb nuts would be entertained by a circus. I got dragged to one when I was like 8 and thought it was retarded. It's even worse when you have a bunch of adults going and actually enjoying it. No wonder the worlds going to hell in a hand basket.

    By Anonymous The only one here who isn't retarded, at 3:14 PM  

  • Reading this was pointless!
    I should have guessed from the blog's tittle...

    Sadly, the most insightful piece of text here was The only one here who isn't retarded's comment.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 8:52 PM  

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